Soooooo much going on. But it's somewhat comforting to know I'm not alone. This mess is happening everywhere.
Honestly, I've been a bit surprised about how rough it's hit me. Not physically of course (I'm healthy), but mentally.
I am 100% working from home until further notice. I'm guessing it will be at least throughout May...possibly longer. There's just no way to tell right now. I do think people are VERY optimistic about time-frames...I'm not one of them.
I work in healthcare. I see/read/hear ALL THE THINGS. All the scary stuff that isn't reported in the news. I see the numbers before they are published. I hear about the PPE issues and what's going on inside hospitals. I get 30-40 emails PER DAY full of nothing but COVID information that I am expected to keep up with. Medicare literally changes things by the minute.
I can't get away from it. My work is not an 'escape'. I work COVID all day and then at night the news comes on, alerts come up on my phone, etc. I can't get away. Which is why I am struggling.
Reading/watching the news stresses me out. But NOT reading/watching the news stresses me out too.
I cannot concentrate on anything outside of work. I concentrate on work for 8+ hours a day, and then after that my brain is just done. I only read 2 books last month because I cannot concentrate on anything. When this first started, my initial thought was 'wow, I'll be able to get SO MUCH DONE!!'. Well...that's just not the case. I just can't concentrate. And I seem to be in a permanent funk, which makes me want to do zero. I'm hoping it gets better.
We are following all the rules. We only go to the store once per week (if that). We are home 24/7. We've started starting our cars once a week just so the batteries don't die. New Mexico is on a mandatory 'Stay at Home' order so we can only go out to go to the grocery store pretty much. Which is fine by me...I honestly think the whole nation should be doing this. ? But I guess it's up to each state.
Last night my husband did the grocery store run for the week and when he came home, I immediately sprayed down the doorknobs/surfaces/groceries/counters, etc. with Lysol spray. This is our new normal.
The cloth masks I ordered from Etsy arrived a couple of weeks ago and now we are using them when we leave the house. I only ordered 4 (2 for my mother-in-law, one each for hubs and I) because, well, we don't leave the house much.
But enough negativity.
Things I am thankful for:
*Zoom. We are able to see our dear brothers and sisters twice a week on Zoom. We can associate 30 minutes before and after the meetings (before they mute us ha ha). We haven't missed a beat with the Zoom meetings because we need them now more than ever.
*Our home. I'm thankful that I love our home and that we all have room to spread out. I'm thankful for the outdoor space so that the dogs can run.
*Our neighborhood. It's walkable, it's safe, it's friendly. 6 feet apart, of course.
*The weather. It has been gorgeous here. Absolutely perfect weather.
*My job. I am thankful that I have a job that allows me to work from home. I have moved my workspace into the guest room. The front room just wasn't cutting it space-wise so I moved all of my stuff into the giant desk in the guest room. It's working so much better. It's more like an office. I can shut the door when I'm done. Even though my job is mentally exhausting, I'm glad to have it.
*Pure Barre. They have not missed a beat getting everything set up with their Live Stream classes. I am able to still take classes from home which is wonderful. It is so good for my head. AND my husband installed a barre for me in our gym. It is so great!
*My health. I am holding steady with my weight, which is 100% fine by me for the moment. I'll start doing my regular weekly health-check ins soon. For now I'm thrilled to be maintaining.
*The extra time. Even though I can't concentrate and am in a funk, I have still managed to get a few things done/organized. I'll try to post pictures when I can.
*I'm thankful that I never scheduled our 10-year anniversary trip. It's just so odd....It's so unlike me to not plan these things way ahead, but there was just something that was holding me back (we were going to go to Florida for a week). I never pulled the trigger. And now I am soooooo glad that we didn't make those plans.
So that's my random brain dump on this past month of life. :) Thanks for reading.
PS: STAY HOME. I hear of people having 'quarantine' parties and it makes me so angry I can't even see straight. I hear of nurses at hospitals with bruising on their faces from wearing masks all day and the back of their ears completely destroyed from the elastic begging and pleading with people to stay home and people aren't listening. Just STAY HOME. And wash your hands. All the time. They should be red and dry and ugly! We keep lotion by all of our sinks (my hands are destroyed).
